stephe wrote:

> >
> > If someone wants to live as a female badly enough,
> > they should be willing to take a bit of a risk and perhaps a cut in
> > pay

> I think you hit the nail on the head here.

>

I agree.  It all comes down to what you want.  What  the priorities are of
the person involved.

> I don't need to "badly enough" or really at all.

Me either, since I am a crossdresser, not a transexual.

> Some of us don't want to live as a female,  just sometimes..

Yes, that's it.  I want to visit the femme side of my personality, let her
out and give her moments offreedom.

> I also want to be a male sometimes...

I like my male self, the female side of me is well integrated into him and
he sees the world througheyes that are different in viewpoint from those  of
his friend.  He helps his SO/Wife around the
house, makes every effort that their relationship is an equal and fair one,
and in general is very much
a nurturer and caregiver.

> I wish I was a  "woman in a mans body" as I would get HRT/SRS and be done
> with it, but
> I'm not.. I go back and forth and for me that's what makes this
> difficult.. I do feel I am more fem inside than most guys all the time,
> but as far as living as a woman I have no desire to do that.

I don't wish this, I am happy the way I am.  I *would* get SRS *if* I felt
it was something I needed,but I just don't.  I am both Katheryn and Ed,
integrated to the point where one of my friends calls
me KathEd.  As for your last statement, if this were a survey I would check
off the box labelled
"strongly agree".

> Do you see  now why some of us don't need to be female in public? We don't
> want to
> BE female all the time..

Yes, and there is nothing wrong with this.   I am SO overtired of people who
keep insisting thateveryone should be all or nothing.   Gay/Het, TS/Cis,
Republican/Democrat........
I have gay friends who insist that there is no such thing as bi.   If you
suck another man's cock, you are gay.  Period.  I have TS friends who tell
me  that crossdressers are people who haven't/can't admit to themselves they
want/need SRS.

I say there is room for everyone and everyone's situation  is valid for that
person, as long as they
are happy with it.  People are on  this world in all shapes and sizes,
configurations and situations.
The frequency and duration of someone's dressing up should be the frequency
and duration that makes that person feel comfortable, happy and complete.

> I see where you're coming from and I too believe that people are crazy to
> go

> enfem downtown alone to sleezy parts of town.

Enfem?   Hell, there are parts of town where the police don't even go
alone!

> but do you understand that some of us don't "need" to
> commit/change our lives to being a TG/woman?

And that doesn't invalidate or lessen the T*ness of the person.   Some
people believe that being afull time crossliver makes them somehow more than
a person who dresses up on the odd Tuesday night.

> It all a matter of *needs*

Indeed!

> and "If someone wants to live as a female badly enough".

People make sacrifices, both big and small, for what they want/need.  I told
a man I'd work for himon a volunteer basis on weekends thru the month of
Feb., since I was not working.  I had a job offer but it meant I'd have to
tell the man I was going to do the volunteer work for I couldn't.  I
wouldn't do that, and passed on the paying job, since my word is VERY
important to me, and I want "badly enough" to be known as reliable and a
person of their word.

> I don't need to.. Its a fun place to visit but I wouldn't want to live
> there..

Me too, but I will always defend the rights  of those who need to!

KDM

--
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